The recent session began on a Saturday morning with an informational breakfast. Upon arrival the coordinators took our picture and provided us with a card to fill out with our name, contact information and what we were looking for in the mentoring relationship. I wrote my personal information and shared I was looking for growth in the Lord and a strong Christian mentor to learn from. I turned my card in, no qualms.
Then realization set in, I was making a six month commitment of time, energy and vulnerability. Fears began welling up inside me. I felt I didn't take time to pray about the decision to join and it may not be the Lord's will for my life. I thought what if I stick my foot in my mouth, as I so often do, and offend or insult my matched mentor. But, the biggest fear of all was being vulnerable to another human being.
Being vulnerable is not one of my best character traits. The fear of rejection is so strong in me. It is so much easier to be quiet, make small talk and not let myself be known. I have opened up at times to a small degree, but I knew the bar was going to be raised during this six month period. The Lord wants me to learn vulnerability to Him and to others.
Trust-Not Fear |
Marriage-Ultimate Mentoring Relationship |
The second thing I believe God wants me to learn about; is Him, His word, and how to live. I can learn about God by going to church services, reading His word and interacting with others. Proverbs 27:17 NKJV. "As iron sharpens iron, So a man sharpens the countenance of his friend." When you have a one-on-one relationship in mentoring, you become vulnerable and accountable to another. You learn from each other's knowledge and experiences. It wasn't an easy decision to be vulnerable to others, so I have chosen to trust God to make me and my mentoring relationship all He wants it to be.
Spot meeting Prince's need |
It has only been a month since I started my new mentoring friendship and I have so much to look forward to, as we both grow together in our faith. I know it will not always be easy, but my desire to know my Savior and Lord Jesus Christ, far outweighs my fear of vulnerability.